beastkingnaoma | (no subject)

(no subject)

Somewhere along the line, I think I became primarily a high school coach.

This is a really distressing realization and I feel like I need to run away from it.

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Embrace the darkness of wealth.

I have never been more tempted.

What's stopping you?

I need this job to continue professionally hitting people so I can be the best at professionally hitting people.

Wut.

It's part of my gym.

Your coach job is part of your gym...?

Yes. I help out by doing it.

I don't get it.

I can either pay money or help with coaching the high school boxing club.

The gym sets up matches and lets me practice there.

And you don't ask me for money, why?

I like helping kids!

... Do something that does that but doesn't feel so humiliating?

Why?

Because being a high school coach is.

The term doesn't project a positive image in the minds of most people.

Sounds fine to me.

I think most people picture a washed out college athlete with a whistle.

... That's not accurate?

I'M NOT A WASHED OUT COLLEGE ATHLETE.

SEE.

THIS IS WHAT I MEANT.

Are you sure?

Yes I'm sure!

...

I don't see it.

Don't see what?

You not being that.

I'm an actual athlete! That is on TV!

I'm not washed up at all!

... So you're just an idiot?

...I'm not an idiot.

You don't get to say that after I find you stuck to a pole.

That was a TRIPLE DOG DARE.

So you're just triple dog dumb.

You just don't understand the severity of such a dare.

I understand that it's stupid.

It was.

But that's the power of the dare.

You freak out about the dumbest stuff.

Oh come on, I'm sure you'd freak out if you suddenly realized you were suddenly like...I dunno...a home ec teacher.

Okay, I guess that'd tweak me a little. Or I guess a lot.

Still, don't do somethin' dumb. That'd be dumb.

I don't do dumb stuff.

...

OTHER THAN THE TONGUE THING.

If I thought about it, I could come up with more.

...Well.

I'm not gonna do anything stupid.

Good.

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